Parents Weekend Abridged

An exhausted Tenzin let out a lengthy, heavy sigh. "Aaaaand we're lost."

Frustrated atop Oogi’s head, he steered his sky bison through the clear night.

"What makes you say we're lost?" Kya popped her head up.

"Because,” chimed in Bumi. "We've passed that same cloud twice!"

Irritated, Kya shot her brother an ugly glance. "Bumi, all clouds look the same."

"Oh no, I'm definitely the same cloud."

"Damn it!" Tenzin urged Oogi to fly faster. "We were supposed to arrive at Ba Sing Se University hours ago! We've already missed the whole first day of Parents' Weekend!"

"Why are we even going?" Bumi whined. "We're not any of their parents!"

"Because, who makes for a more entertaining storyline? Us or Senna?"

"Good point,” Bumi conceded.

"There it is!" The three siblings applauded in unison as Oogi gently lowered onto the campus of Ba Sing Se University, and, excited to finally get up, they gleefully slipped off the flying beast's tale.

"It's so pretty here," noted Kya, spotting the clean, prestigious campus, illuminated by candlelight.

"Well," started Bumi. "It's too late to see Korra now. Why don't we try to get into one of those frat parties!"

Kya nodded excitedly. "Yes!"

"What?" gasped Tenzin sternly. "I am not going to a party! I came here to see Korra, and I'm not wasting my time with a bunch of… meatheads!"

Bumi groaned, but then a poster caught his attention. "Hey, look at this! It says Lord Zuko is giving a presentation right now in the Kyoshi Room! Oh… and apparently Cher is performing here too. Huh."

"Zuko?!" Tenzin whipped around. "Oh my goodness!” Without another word, he merrily skipped away to find the Kyoshi Room where one of his idol's was speaking.

Kya and Bumi giggled to themselves as they turned around and left in search of a frat lounge.

By the time Tenzin reached the Kyoshi Room, every seat was taken except for one in the very front row. He could have tactfully stood in the back without disturbing anyone, but it was Tenzin.

Trying to duck down as if that would prevent anyone from seeing him, he awkwardly stumbled to the seat, which happened to be in the direct center of the row.

"Sorry!" He stepped on a girl's toe. “Oh! Sorry! Sorry…"

Finally, he had made it to his chair, where he whipped out a laptop with the loudest keyboard known to man.

Typing vigorously, he couldn't help but squeal in excitement from being in Zuko's presence.

He leaned to the girl sitting next to him. "I know this guy!" he whispered louder than he realized.

Just to be more annoying, he then proceeded to cough violently for twenty seconds.

"Does anyone have any questions?" intrigued the former Fire Lord.

"Oooh! Zuko! ME!" Tenzin waved his arms, but it was another student that caught the presenter's attention.

"Yes, girl in the back."

"Hi, my name is Kuvira. Can you go over how to amass power again? Like how to take over a country, maybe?"

"Um." The world leader was puzzled. "I don't think I covered that…"

"Are you sure?"

Kuvira's response was met by an awkward silence.

"Never mind."

Kya and Bumi had heard about a party across campus, and they were on their way when they passed a group of four, weird-looking outcasts sitting by the fountain. One of them was a bald man with a scar.

"I wish I was an Airbender, you know man? So I could be free, you know?. Free. Shouldn't all people be… free?"

A girl with an outlandish hairdo and outfit spoke next, "People who call me a third-eye freak just don't get it. I'm proud to be a freak. I don't want to fit in and CONFORM!"

"I lavabent before it was cool."

"Arms are way too mainstream."

Scoffing, the siblings walked past the hipsters and soon were at the front door to the lounge of Greeka Lifa Sucksa, a fraternity at Ba Sing Se University.

Before they tried to walk in, it became clear from the roaring cheers somewhere in the distance that the Cher concert had begun.

"Ba Sing Se!" they heard. "I've got one question for you! DO YOU BELIEEEVE IN LIFE AFTER LOVE?''"

"See," said Bumi. "I told you she'd open with that."

"Whatever," retorted the Waterbender. "Let's go inside."

Before they could, a kid in his early twenties with a popped collar, salmon-colored shorts, and a backwards snapback hat stopped them.

"Hold up, who do you know here?"

The two adults glanced at each other nervously. “We, uhhhhh."

"Hey, aren't you a little old to be Freshmen?"

Kya thought up an excuse. "We only look old because of all the hardcore drugs we use! Yeah!"

“Get lost!"

Just then, Kya spotted a friendly face out of the corner of her eye. "Hey! Bolin!"

The young Earthbender looked over and rolled his eyes in disgust and embarrassment. "Ugh," he moaned as he reluctantly walked over.

"Bolin!" exclaimed Bumi. "You gotta let us in to this party!"

Kya became very stern. "And if you don't, you'll never get another ounce of that dope shit I smoke you up with."

Bolin timidly waved them in. "Just don't embarrass me."

Two hours later, the party was a great time, until Chief Lin Beifong and the university police arrived to bust it.

"All right!" barked the chief. "Everybody line up to be breathalyzed!"

Bolin was very upset. "Awww come on, Lin! Let us have fun!"

"I don't know the meaning of fun. Did you not see the episode that shows my entire childhood was depraved?"

A stumbling Bumi waltzed up. "Hey! YOU. SUCK."

Lin was unfazed. "Aren't you too old to be drinking illegally?"

Kya approached the conflict and gasped. "Look, Lin! It's your mother's approval!"

"WHERE?!"

When the Chief whipped her head around the students were able to mount a quick escape.

As they were half running, half stumbling, Bumi glanced over to his sister. "Best night in college, ever!"